So I’m getting a lot of e-mails these days that are running along the lines of this:
Oh hey there blogger person who’s name I didn’t bother to learn!
We loooove your blog. Really dig the way you write about <INSERT SOMETHING TO MAKE BLOGGER THINK WE READ THEIR SHIZZ HERE>.
Anyhoo, do we have good news for you, girlfriend! As you’re so darn special we’ve selected you – yes, YOU! – to take part in our awesome campaign along with nine other
suckers stupid enough to go along with this bloggers.
This is how it works: We want you to tell the world about our amazing new brand ambassador and are giving you the chance to spend your Friday night interviewing her in a run down department store to get her top tips on X, Y, Z. (What do you mean that sounds really boring and that you’d rather spend the evening getting blind drunk with your girlfriends? Come on, it’s going to be awesome!).
We’re then going to send you a cheap ‘n nasty body lotion/shampoo/mascara along with a rad branded key ring/lanyard/flash drive/mouse pad. You’re to then take an hour out of your crazy-busy day to sit and create a post about how awesome our newsflash/product/ambassador/campaign is. And best you be crazy creative and whore it out all over the net as much as possible ‘cos, in the end, we’re going to award a prize to the blogger who creates the most noise online. Woop, woop!
The prize? A hamper of ten more body lotions! We’ll also send you *another* ten body lotions for you to give away to your readers. Oh yeah! Sure, it’ll cost you R1000 to ship ‘em out across SA, but hey, we assume you’d have zero ish with incurring an expense to help us score free press and sell more product, right? Right?!
I’m now at the point where, instead of replying, I’m just going to send them a link to this. Or maybe my just rate card. While I don’t and won’t accept payment for review, I’m not going to help you get your campaign on for free.